Adelaide Student Politics

In the last Board Pack, there was a document by the AUU General Manager that addressed...something. The document was confidential, so of course none of our extremely honest board directors (or any of our dishonest board directors) would tell me what was in it. As I trudged through the alley ways behind the physics building, coming up with ever more outrageous ideas about how to get the information, I was hailed by a creaking old voice. A little old lady, bent from the weight of a hundred insubstantial shawls, was shuffling her tarot cards as she watched me pass by. "Why not?", I thought. "She can't tell me any less about this report than I know now." At first, she seemed to think that a dollar spent on finding out about student politics was a dollar wasted, but then she staggered theatrically, and slumped onto her stool. With quivering hands she took up her cards, asked me to think hard about my question, shuffle them and place my final bet. Then she laid them down...

The first card to come out was the Emperor, who she said signified authority, dominance and a source of immediate change. This was followed by the Devil, which she said was an omen of a negative situation that had come about from clouded judgement, and could not be avoided. She spoke of failure and disaster as a result. Laid out as they were, the Emperor was said to be a harbinger of the devil's omens, a figure of authority preaching to all of the tragic fate that would be brought down as a result of this poor foresight. Could this mean that the report says the Union is still in trouble, and in fact might still collapse after all?

The next three cards whispered sibilantly of the woes that had led to this sad state of affairs, according to the report. First, the Justice, peering up at us as it sat there, ominously upside-down. A sign of complicated rules and confusion, this lead me to think that someone else had noticed how convoluted the Union's many laws, policies and strange power structures are. It was followed by a reversed Temperance card; a sign of conflicts, competing interests, division and hostility, which could only refer to the factional bickering and political conniving that plagues the board. Obviously. The final card in this set was the Hanged Man. He was the right way up, but in a bad way, because he was hanging from the ankle. In wafts of wine-red tinted halitosis, it was explained to me that this signified a crowd mentality and a lack of effort, often caused by a single-year stint on a board that's controlled by three or four strong personalities. Really, for a deck of old cards, they seemed to know an awful lot about how the AUU works.

She turned then to the future that the Emperor sees for the Union. Two cards were laid down: the Tower and the King of Swords. Great and mostly unwelcome changes are in store, according to this frail old clairvoyant. She said that the report calls for an influx of authority, power that is detatched and determined, almost militaristic compared to the old order. This sounded to me like no student organisation I'd ever heard of, almost as though the Board would be replaced with a professional management who oversaw the affiliates and left the SRC as the only political body, relegating the Board to a role as a diminished student advisory body. But then, as the frail mystic reminded me, the cards can be interpreted in many different ways.

As I wandered away, contemplating her words and feeling like that was a gold coin well spent, she called to me again. A final card had fallen from the deck as I stood up: a reversed Ace of Coins. She said that this showed spiritual impoverishment on the part of the report, and a focus on material assets, prosperity and comfort over the strong community that used to be the mainstay of the Union (well, that and a student services fee). Who knows, there might have even been some truth in what she said.

There's going to be a special meeting on February 12th, Margaret Murray at 5:30pm to look at governance issues. Feel free to come and try to get a handle on what's happening. Unfortunately, the meeting is likely to be in camera, so we're making up a list of possible pass times. Feel free to add your own ideas...

• Playing cards
• *Not* listening through the window like some people were trying to last time
• Harassing everyone who has a weak bladder
• Speculating a lot on what's going on
• Selling cream pies to everyone who might want to throw something during the discussion
• Selling popcorn to everyone who's just there to enjoy the spectacle